In which CLSO blows my mind with his knowledge of antacids

Corner Liquor Store Owner:

You don't look well.

Me:

I have heartburn from drinking 7Eleven coffee.

Corner Liquor Store Owner:

Drink whole milk.

Me:

I'm going to try the Pepcid tropical fruit chewables.

Corner Liquor Store Owner:

You should get Prilosec, it is the strongest and best antacid on the market that you can get over the counter. They have it at Sav-On* (*There's no such thing as Sav-On anymore, it's CVS, but we all know what's going on. It'll always be Sav-On. CVS is a lie and the fact that he referred to it as Sav-On made me like, want to hug him because Sav-On was the place of so many wonderful childhood memories. Mostly the ones involving candy.) go ask the people there. It's in a purple box. Blocks the acid burn for 24 hours even if you get many heart burns. Trust me, but drink whole milk first. Try that.

Me:

Wow.

Corner Liquor Store Owner:

Yes, it comes in the purple box.