October 2010
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Cruising down 7th St.
Me: Oh my god, look at all the homeless people.
Sarah: Yeah, but look at the people with tents, they're set.
Me: There's so many!
Sarah: Although, for all we know, this could be the line for a scratch 'n' dent sale.
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In which CLSO blows my mind with his knowledge of...
Corner Liquor Store Owner: You don't look well.
Me: I have heartburn from drinking 7Eleven coffee.
Corner Liquor Store Owner: Drink whole milk.
Me: I'm going to try the Pepcid tropical fruit chewables.
Corner Liquor Store Owner: You should get Prilosec, it is the strongest and best antacid on the market that you can get over the counter. They have it at Sav-On* (*There's no such thing as Sav-On anymore, it's CVS, but we all know what's going on. It'll always be Sav-On. CVS is a lie and the fact that he referred to it as Sav-On made me like, want to hug him because Sav-On was the place of so many wonderful childhood memories. Mostly the ones involving candy.) go ask the people there. It's in a purple box. Blocks the acid burn for 24 hours even if you get many heart burns. Trust me, but drink whole milk first. Try that.
Me: Wow.
Corner Liquor Store Owner: Yes, it comes in the purple box.
I SAW A GIRLMEETSBEAR THIS NIGHT.
fidelcostco:
We talked about poising significant others with seafood. I find myself having that conversation pretty often.
Fidel rocked a tie in a Gold Room of Miller Lite.
Classy 4evr ‘n evr.
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Sub-musing Sundays
I like that it’s October because my Starbucks Halloween cups (that I use daily) are finally relevant.
The Under Neighbors are consistent in their Sunday 9am electric guitar jams. This week it’s heavy metal riffs. Alas, again, very Halloween relevant.
Do you think Kanye gets his greatest thoughts while sitting on the toilet like the rest of us? I like to think “yes”.
If your seat on a plane...
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“Love is dope, not chicken noodle soup.”
– Even Cowgirls Get the Blues
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I wonder if I can go into the carpool lane with...
Bart vs Harold
I’m totally feeling it.
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A Thirst for Adventure: The Official Beverages →
Wine - Rock Climbing
Like rock climbing, drinking wine should be done in pairs. Nothing gets the blood moving and the heart rate up like a couple of glasses of cab sav. With the buzz of wine while facing those difficult verticals, you’ll know exactly when your muscles give out, plummeting you several feet (or inches, in my case) to the ground. Can’t rock climb? Doesn’t mean you can’t enjoy...
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I re-lit the pilot to the heater, opened an...
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Saturday
Me: (Looking at my cat) I wonder what it's like to not have balls.
Trevor: Um...
Me: ...
Trevor: ...you don't have balls.
Me: Oh yeahhhhh
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Just had thanksgiving dinner
sade:
with my best friend.
LOL family? no thanksss.
This year I’m thankful (just typed ‘thankfuck’ and laughed for a solid 15 seconds) for:
the internet
drugs
35% of my friends
I don’t know about you guys, but I can’t wait for all the holiday thankfucks.
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Whatcha cooking on a hot day, Kelly?
Soup
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Corner Liquor Store Owner's Brother and I discuss...
Brother: How do you figure out your credit score?
Me: You can go online and find it. But don't go to FreeCreditReport.com, they lie.
Brother: About my credit?
Me: No, they charge.
Brother: How do they know?
Me: You have to give them your social security number and credit card number and...
Brother: No, no. Never putting that online. I don't do that. Where does it go? Anyone can see it. I don't trust the Internet like that.
Me: Trust no one, Agent Mulder.
Brother: What?
Me: Nothing.